So, I read these incredible blog posts about women who were choosing one word for the year to help them in their efforts to become more of who they need to be.

And I thought,

Wow. That is incredible.  I love what they are doing.

And then I went on with my day until I started seeing other people choosing one word and my friend did a Relief Society activity on it, and someone mentioned they had seen the idea on national television and then I thought:

“So, is this a thing?”

As in,

“Should I be feeling guilty that it is already the middle of January and I don’t have A Word yet?”

I did some looking on Google, and I found out that it is, indeed, a thing, and I felt momentarily like maybe I had missed out because I didn’t even have A Word last year. And we all know how that turned out.

Okay, so maybe not everyone knows, but my kids can tell you that probably I might have done better if I’d had A Word.

Maybe they needed A Word for last year–like:

Homework.

Doesn’t that inspire?

So in a momentary panic that I was already sadly behind this year, I frantically searched for my One Word, because it can’t just be any word–it kind of has to feel deep and you kind of have to be able to say it in a breathy way so that it lingers in the air for moments after you say it making everyone feel, you know–inspired.  It couldn’t just be a word like

Sleep.

It had to be something like “BELIEVE” or “INFINITY” or “REACH” or something.

And, of course, it has to be pretty amazing because you’re stuck with it for the whole year.  It has to be something you’re not going to fall out of love with by March 2nd.

I decided I might try cheating.  I looked up some people’s words for the year.

Ann Voskamp chose “IN”.  You have to say it with feeling, and you can just hear it oozing depth and harmony with the universe.  Plus, she wrote a whole post about it and she already has it as distressed wooden lettering…

Anne Voskamp, "In"

Anne Voskamp, “In”

WITH A SEASHELL!  Also, Ann Voskamp could have probably chosen the word “SNAIL” and found a beautiful meaning to it.

One woman chose “EMBRACE,” (she even already had subway art printed!)  another, “CHOOSE,” one of my best friend’s word this year is “JOY.”

Then there was “OBEDIENCE,” and “ENOUGH” and the list goes on.

Then there was my friend who chose the Hebrew word, “AVODAH” which is completely awesome and she wrote about it and it’s absolutely amazing.

She also had these photos that were just incredible.  And you can’t look at the photo and think “oh, that’s just a nice picture of some cracked eggshells.”

Chocolate On My Cranium, "Avodah"

Chocolate On My Cranium, “Avodah”

No.

Because it’s in her One Word post.  And because it’s part of her One Word,  it means Something More.

Something Deep.

So, for a second I almost forgot my resolution not to compare myself to others and I almost started to pity myself, because in a hundred million years I could never take a photo of cracked eggshells and have it feel deep or soulful.

And secondly, I spent three days trying to come up with my One Word that would be deep and profound and meaningful.

I even tried praying.

Nothing.

No, “nothing” is not my One Word.  I mean, I got nothing.

No inspiration.

No insight.

No philosophical reflectiveness.

No feeling like I needed to write poetry or anything.

What could be my One Word for 2013?

Apocalypse?

No, too many zombie connotations, and I couldn’t say it all breathy and make it feel good.

Finally, I knew my word.  But, to me, it seemed somewhat anticlimactic after all the reading I did.

But, I can’t deny My One Word.

My One Word

My One Word

Mostly as in “I could use some more.”

Because sometimes I feel like my main purpose of existence is to be a “service opportunity.”

I really felt like this was my word, because I do need Help.

Every single day.

Without it, I couldn’t do anything good that I do.

I think my hope is that if I make this my One Word, Heaven will take note and send more “Help.”  And, you know, I know Heaven will. Because Heaven always does.

Heaven never fails in the Help department.

Maybe my hope is that if it’s my One Word, I will take note of the Help more often.

There is another side to this word, though.  One that I hesitated to think about, because I feel so awkwardly inadequate sometimes.

But, that is that maybe my One Word could be “HELP” as in

“I could give some.”

For as much as I love heaven helping me, I love even more being able to be  “the help.”

I hope this year heaven can use me to succor, to lift, to benefit, to do good to, to cure, to amend, to lift, to deliver from suffering.

If only I can be as good a help as I have always been given.

And, I have no photography or poetry, but I do have a painting that, to me, epitomizes my One Word:

Bloch's "Gethsemane"

Bloch’s “Gethsemane”

HELP.

Let me be the help, and let me receive it with gratitude.