My PICC line is out.
My white blood cell count is going down.
Look At My Room!
I am actually not staying in my room right now, instead I have swapped with my girls and am in the dorm room. The girls are in the master bedroom upstairs because I can’t really do stairs yet.
Welcome Home, ME!
I can’t believe how well they prepared the room–it was so clean and beautiful! It looks stunning!
They also did all the decorations, including this lovely paper display chain and flying dragon:
Dragons!
I am so glad to be home! It is a wonderful thing. I did, however, cry on the way home. I was so afraid that I wouldn’t be able to deal with anything very well. It turns out that the children have become so very considerate and kind that they are all trying to be soft and gentle–which is so beautiful to me. I hardly recognize my oldest two–they have taken on such responsibility, and have become a young man and a young woman.
I am actually having a difficult time with my emotions right now. It turns out that nearly dying can also be emotionally difficult. It turns out there is a little bit of guilt that I am feeling for having put my husband and children through this, among many other emotions.
I know that is utterly silly, but there it is. I don’t make sense right now to myself.
But, I know it will all be okay.
I am just trying to listen to the Spirit and to be careful not to do too much, but to also challenge myself.
Today, I took a shower after I went to get my PICC line out. That was a lot, because I washed my hair and stood for quite some time. I also ate a small bowl of salad finally (before I had been only able to eat a few bites).
My favorite thing I did today was to hold my 8 month old, Daniel for about five minutes. It was awesome! My other favorite part was cuddling with Noah, who is signing more now and kept signing “mommy” today (talk about melting my heart!).
Tomorrow is going to be great, even if it is challenging!
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{ 13 comments… read them below or add one }
So grateful you’re home. Praying for all of you to have a wonderful night and a peaceful tomorrow. Love you.
Yay! So happy for you! And glad you got some baby snuggles in.
Yay!!!! So glad you’re home and surrounded by love and dragons. I bet your little men missed you dearly. Well, I’m sure all your kids did. Sounds like you’ve taught them well. Best of luck on your recovery. I keep sending prayers your way, via heaven, of course.
There will be lots of feelings to process; let them come, even if they don’t make sense. It will be okay. It won’t be like that forever, right? Right. When it’s all said and done, I know you’ll all look back and feel the hand of God carrying you through this whole pregnancy.
Besides, at the moment I’m sure they’re so grateful you’re alive, they’ll gladly ride a few wild crazy mood swings.
Hip, hip hooray!! Enjoy those baby snuggles and the daily gift to be there with your family.
Hooray for being home and amazing children!!!
Oh my! Wishing you joy and peace in your recovery!
I am so glad you are home. I pray that you heal up quickly and fully, and your family will be strengthened from all of this.
WONDERFUL!!!!!!! {{{{{{Hugs!}}}}}}
YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I teared up–I am so glad you are home with your babies!!! And your Little Men and Little Women!
Tears are a good thing! I always feel better after a little cry; it releases those pent up emotions. Just be sure to drink water! Crying always makes me thirsty, haha.
Love and hugs to you!
Nicole
Wonderful news!
God bless you and your husband and your dear children. May He bless you with full and complete healing. And may your children learn and grown even more in this opportunity to love and serve you.
Thank you so much for your support and encouragement! I can say with a lot of confidence that I think this part is the part where I am going to need it the most, now that I am out of imminent danger. I still have to go back and check my blood next week, but now I face the prospect of recovery, which is daunting!
I never imagined how hard it can be just to walk, to talk, to lift up my leg. My right side is still having a hard time cooperating, but the doctors do expect a full recovery. I just can’t say how blessedly sweet it is to be in my home, which is my piece of heaven.
Often, when I feel particularly discouraged, I will think of all of you and your beautiful kindness to me, and your faith and hope in me, and your prayers. I think of your beauty and strength and it helps me to rally, so THANK YOU!!