insights from motherhood — j & m ranch

insights from motherhood

Post image for three lessons i have learned about having a mother heart

I never really began to understand having a mother heart  until I was faced with the loss of my daughter, Joy. To be honest, I learned a lot more than three lessons, but these are some that I am thinking about tonight. At first, though, I didn’t learn anything. I just felt like God had [...]

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a broken vase

{03.08.13} · 8 comments

Post image for a broken vase

I was upstairs. I was contemplating trying once again to take down the “Thomas The Tank Engine” duvet cover I’ve had hanging over my window since February 11. Thomas, Percy and Friends stare at me every day, asking when I am going to let the sunshine in and allow them to go back to the [...]

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Post image for …and then you just know

Praying is sometimes really hard work. And I have found that sometimes I am commanded to pray for something and it’s such a wonderful, sure experience.  And I am just absolutely certain and I pray with all my heart and exert myself and then… Nothing. Sometimes it’s nothing for a little while, but sometimes it’s [...]

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Post image for my one word for the new year

So, I read these incredible blog posts about women who were choosing one word for the year to help them in their efforts to become more of who they need to be. And I thought, Wow. That is incredible.  I love what they are doing. And then I went on with my day until I [...]

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the Master

{01.13.13} · 7 comments

Post image for the Master

So, my friend Shauna just commented in my recent post about having a gospel centered curriculum: The Hebraic method is very daunting to me because I don’t want my children to be like me. I’d rather they have Christ as the teacher. And I wanted to share my thoughts about this–because I think we all [...]

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Post image for saints and angels

Life is good to me. Especially when I get to use it like a mirror, showing a true reflection of who I really am.  Not who I wish I were.  Not who other people think I am.  Just me. Kind of like my full-length mirror in the bathroom.  There I am in all my imperfection [...]

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Post image for thanksgiving at the ranch

Was not what we expected. And, I guess that is what I should expect. All day Tuesday I was distracted thinking about Noah.  Our family was going through our annual holiday flu/stomach virus tradition (well, it’s the third year in a row, so I guess it’s somewhat of a tradition…hopefully shortlived), and while it wasn’t [...]

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Post image for a book, a column and…thirteen diamonds

August and September were interesting. There were so many things going on–our little bear was getting ready to undergo testing for a brain tumor, our baby boy was just barely getting used to mortality, and we were all getting moved in to the new ranch. And I was really praying a lot.  Mostly for the [...]

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Post image for of pajamas and beauty and pots and pans

Last week, I realized my wee one was 15 weeks old. Why, you ask, did my brain suddenly begin to do complex  math like figuring out how many weeks old my baby was? Because I finally realized that while I may be able to get away with pajama wearing a little longer around my very [...]

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Post image for the summer’s dying…

Joy’s birthday is on October 2nd. And when summer has all but slipped away, and I am hanging on to the last petals from the last flowers, I seem to hang on a little tighter now. Ever since the end of that perfect last summer we had with her,  I have tended to believe that [...]

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